Sunday, 1 July 2012
Is Three A Crowd?
Just over two years ago I was lying on a table in an operating theatre awaiting the birth of my second child. If I remember rightly I was quite loudly and vehmently saying "never again" to the young and rather frightened looking anethetist. However now my eldest is about to start school and my youngest is becoming a little boy rather than a baby I find that I might be changing my mind.
Ironically I was never a particularly maternal person before I had children. I would sigh in dread if we got on a flight full of children when on holiday and glare at parents if their children were loud and badly behaved in a restaurant (don't worry - karma soon got me back for that one!). Then I had my daughter and I loved being a mum but being an only child myself I would have been quite happy with one. My husband had other ideas though and two years later we had my son.I fell in love with him and I thought that was it.
But there still seems to be a bit of a niggle in my mind that my family is not quite complete. I look at family photos and wonder if there should be a third little face peeping out at me, I weep whilst watching One Born Every Minute and admit to feeling a little bit envious when I see a glowing pregnant woman, although I was far from glowing in both my pregnancies!
When I try to think about it rationally I can see both pros and cons of having a third child. It would mean needing a bigger house, a bigger car and paying more for holidays. However it would also mean a large family full of noise and hopefully laughter. I think that as an only child I'm also aware that my children do not have many relatives on my side of the family so part of me wants to create a large support network for them.
So am I crazy to want a third or should I fulfil my dreams? Would it mean an idyll of three beautifuly dressed and well behaved children living an Enid Blyton life - going rockpooling, enjoying country rambles and reading stories around a roaring fire. Or would it mean me sitting in Pizza Express frantically trying to glug a glass of wine whilst simultaniously feeding a baby, preventing a toddler from throwing their plate on the floor and trying to dodge pasta thrown by an irate and ignored eldest?
Do you have one, two, three or even more children? Help me decide!